Thursday, April 26, 2012

Clobbering “Biblical” Gay Bashing, Rev. Mark A. Sandlin


Clobbering “Biblical” Gay Bashing
 Rev. Mark A. Sandlin 
                                                               
(I wrote the piece for another project and it just wasn't a good fit.
Honestly, if you are well read on the issue of the Bible and its take
on homosexuality [or lack thereof], there is little new in here. For
you, I hope this can be a quick reference. If you are not well read
on such things, this may be a bit of a bumpy ride, but bumpy rides
can be a lot of fun. Either way, I hope I was able to take what is
sometimes thick reading, albeit important reading, and make it at
least bearable and mostly straight forward).

Christianity and “Biblical” Hatefulness


We Christians are good at a lot of things. Helping others. Dressing up on Sunday.  Quoting scripture.
Pot luck meals. Taking care of church members. Weddings. Funerals. Worship. But perhaps the thing at
which we are the most persistently exceptional is misinterpreting the Bible then running amuck in the
world because of it. Honestly, mad skills. And history backs me up on this one.

We have used the Bible to support, promote and act upon some pretty un-Christian things: slavery,
holocaust, segregation, subjugation of women, apartheid, the Spanish Inquisition (which, no one ever
expects – shameless Monty Python reference; there will be another), domestic violence, all sorts of
exploitation and the list could go on and on. Oddly, if you ask theologians to pick one biblical theme to
rule them all, most of them would say “love”... well, love and grace. Okay, love, grace and forgiveness.
Fine. They probably would not specifically agree on a single term, but they would most likely name
something that is, in every way, the opposite of the oppression, belittlement, hatred and marginalization
represented by the numerous atrocities committed by the Christian Church.

More times than not, these atrocities are the result of trying to play God, pretending as if one group of
people has complete knowledge of God's will and is more blessed or chosen by God. Not surprisingly,
the people who see the world this way are always exactly the people who also happen to belong in the
group they believe to be the uber-blessed. Lucky them.

Time and time again, Jesus made it clear that we should not put ourselves in the place of playing God
and that, unlike far too many humans, God welcomes and loves us all equally. Period.

But we keep doing it. We keep doing it even though each time after we argue, name-call, suppress
others and fight for centuries, falsely playing the role of heavenly judge and jury, we slowly realize that
we got it wrong. We realize that, in fact, Paul was not promoting slavery. We learn to contextualize his
statements and letters. We become more skilled at interpreting the original Greek and, over time, we
decide to stop quoting the Bible to support slavery (or the subjugation of women, or racism, etc.)
because we finally come around to realizing that, as Rob Bell's book points out, biblically love wins.
Always.

And so we find ourselves here again. Doing the thing we do best: misinterpreting the Bible and ruining
lives with it. We are, once again, ignoring the biblical bias for those who are marginalized, abused,
belittled and negatively judged. Ignoring the biblical directive to show all the children of God love (and
grace... and forgiveness).

Clobbering “Biblical” Gay Bashing  
                                             
Hate By Any Other Name


Oh sure, this time around we have “softened” our approach, saying things like “hate the sin, love the
sinner,” but we fail to recognize that what we are calling a “sin” and the person we are calling a
“sinner” are one and the same. A person whose sexual orientation is homosexual, or bi-sexual, or queer
can no more separate themselves from their sexuality than a heterosexual person can. It's like saying
“hate the toppings, love the pizza.” It's just not the pizza without the toppings. We just aren't loving the
person if we don't love the whole person.

I suspect the “softening” of the language we use has everything to do with making us feel better and
very little with making LGBTQ folk feel better, because it certainly doesn't make them feel any better.
As a matter of fact, the love/hate (emphasis on hate) relationship that the Church continues to push on
this group of people only serves to push them into closets and into even darker places, which
sometimes leads to suicide. The Church and its approach to this issue are at fault for most of the hurt,
anguish, self-doubt, abuse and death associated with being LGBTQ. Not very loving. Not very grace
filled. But it certainly leaves us in need of forgiveness.

Many Christians have lost their way in this twisty-turny maze of how to practice our faith. We would
much rather reinforce the things we want to believe than believe the sometimes difficult teachings of
Jesus. Who, on a side note, never said a word about homosexuality but did tell us to gouge out our
lustful eyes. Which seems to me is more likely to leave us all blind than the “eye for and eye” thing.

The Bible As A Sex Manual


So, as others have pointed out before, we use the Bible as if it is a sex manual, telling us what is and
isn't acceptable in the eyes of the Lord your God. Thereby delineating out those whom it is okay for us
to judge, and toward whom it is okay to direct all kinds of nastiness and holier-than-thouisms.
The reality is that the Bible is not a sex manual. I know, shocker. Right? Actually, it's a good thing
(depending on your particular level of sexual prudishness – personally, compared to the Bible, mine is
pretty high). You see, the Bible not only promotes marriage between a man and a woman, but it insist
that that marriage be within the same faith. Not only should a wife be subordinate (Ephesians 5:22), but
she should also prove her virginity... lest she be stoned (Deuteronomy 22:20-21). Oh, and the whole
thing would probably be much better if it were arranged (Genesis 24:37-38). And that's just the warm
up act.

According to the Bible, if a woman's husband dies and she hasn't had a son, she must marry his brother
and have intercourse with him until she has a son (Mark 12:18-27). Sometimes, biblically wives are
good, but concubines are better. Many of the “men of God” were not only married, but at least three of
them had more than one concubine (Abraham, Caleb, Solomon) and they remained “men of God.” But
like I said, “biblically wives are good” and there's no such thing as too much of a good thing. Right?
So, why not have may wives? God frequently blessed polygamists (Esau, Jacob, Gideon, David,
Solomon, Belshazzar).

As far as sexuality and the Bible's perspective on woman as property and as slaves... well, as you can
imagine, it does not get any better.

Making Choices


The point is this: most of us have matured enough theologically to recognize that we need to
contextualize the writings of the Bible, and because of it we have moved passed using these examples
as the end-all-be-all on acceptable practices of sexuality.  However, somehow, we have not managed to
apply the very same understanding to the Bible verses that have become known as the “clobber verses”
in the Bible. “Clobber" because they are the verses most used to clobber people who are gay or who
support gay rights.

That is really interesting when you consider that, of all the topics I just mentioned, sexual orientation is
the only one that is not a choice. Polygamy, concubines, marrying your brother's widow? All choices,
and we have decided to “get over” the biblical directives for them. Sexual orientation? Not a choice.
(There are those who still argue otherwise, but the science is clear, so I'm not even having that
discussion). So many Christians just aren't able to get past that one. Equally interesting to consider: it is
actually more of a choice to judge and marginalize people over being homosexual, or, bi-sexual, or
queer; than it is a choice to be homosexual, or, bi-sexual, or queer. Yet we judge them and not
ourselves.

Since we clearly have a difficult time letting go of the clobber verses, let's take them one by one and
very briefly consider what is really going on in them. It should help us arrive at a clearer picture of
what the writers of these scriptures were trying to tell us. What we will find is this: as we get caught up
in judging others over what we want the verses to say, we miss the opportunity to understand how to be
the people God is calling us to be.

As we get started, we all need to be on the same page on one thing. When the Bible was written, the
earth was flat, the sun orbited the earth and the idea of a person having a sexual 'orientation' was
completely foreign. There is some debate about who actually kick-started the understanding of sexual
orientation (Heinrich Hoessli or Karl Heinrich Ulrich - personally, I am on Team Heinrich), but it is
clear that the concept of people having a sexual orientation was first introduced in the 1800's making it
a thoroughly modern construct.

Clearly, there are a few Bible verses that involve same-sex acts (and of those, almost all of them are
male-male sex), but given the modern advent of recognizing the existence of sexual orientation, we
must accept the reality that the writers of those verses were in no way trying to, let alone capable of,
acknowledging, understanding and addressing homosexual orientation. What then, might they have
been trying to tell us in the clobber verses? Let's take a look.

The Clobber Verses


Let me just say right off the top, three of the verses that are sometimes considered clobber verses have
nothing to do with the question of homosexuality. Putting Genesis 2:21-25, Deuteronomy 23:17 and
Jude 1:6-7 in the category of anti-gay verses is nothing more than an attempt to beef up the number of
verses that are supposedly “against” homosexuality. They have nothing to do with it. So, I am simply
going to ignore them. If someone attempts to use them as proof of the “abomination” of homosexuality,
I suggest you simply ignore them as well.

Genesis 19:1-11


The great thing about defending the Bible against people who want to use Genesis 19:1-11 to gay bash
is that you really don't have to do any work. The Bible does it for you. For better or for worse, this is
also the verse with which the general population is probably most familiar in terms of what they think
of as verses about homosexuality. Even the term “sodomy” is linked to this Bible passage.

It is the story of two travelers (messengers from God) being given shelter by Lot and his family.
Hospitality was a very big deal in those days. In this story, the men of Sodom decided to approach Lot's
home and to make less than hospitable demands on him and his guest. To get a sense of how important
hospitality was, when the men of the town say they want to force themselves (most likely sexually) on
Lot's guest, Lot actually offers up his daughters instead. Despicable, deplorable, a great way to
permanently damage your relationship with your daughters and the rest of your family (to say the
least), but a sure sign that hospitality was a big deal.

In the end, the men of the town did not get what they wanted. They wanted to exert their dominance of
the guests. They wanted to humiliate them, as warriors after conquering a foe might do in those days,
sexually putting another male into the position of a woman (who after all was thought of as property, as
weak, and as soft and therefore less than a man).

Even though the men never actually exerted their power over Lot's guests in a male-male sex act,
people still insist on using this text as proof that homosexuality is an “abomination.” Well, like I said,
“the great thing about defending the Bible against people who want to use Genesis 19:1-5 to gay bash
is that you really don't have to do any work. The Bible does it for you.”
Sodom is referenced multiple times in the Bible as an example of great sinning. And what might that
sin be?

In Isaiah 1:10-17 it is thought to be injustice, not rescuing the oppressed, defending the orphan,
pleading for the widow. In Jeremiah 23:14 it is adultery. In Ezekiel 16:48-49 it is the sin of not aiding
the “poor and needy.” In Zephaniah 2:8-11 the sin is bullying, boasting and pride. In the Wisdom of
Solomon it is “the bitter hatred of strangers.”

The sin is not about being gay. It is not about non-straight sexual orientation. The sin of Sodom was
lacking hospitality, not being just, bullying, hating strangers, not caring for those marginalized.  Funny,
they are all things Churches (and individuals for that matter) sorely need to keep in mind and be better
at practicing when it comes to how we do or do not welcome LGBTQ folk into our lives. After all, in
today's society, who is more marginalized, more bullied, more treated like a “stranger,” than them?
Come to think of it, not so funny.

 Leviticus 18:22 & 20:13


If someone were to canonize a buzz-kill, it would look remarkably, and uncomfortably, like the book of
Leviticus. Honestly, this three-thousand plus year old holiness code is not exactly a big ball of fun. For
starters, just try reading it. On second thought, I like you, so don't. Fortunately for you, I've done it for
you. (I know, nice. Right? I'm just that kind of guy).

Among the jewels you'll find in it are a mandate to kill disobedient children, a dietary restriction to not
eat shellfish (God Hates Shrimp!), a law that would prevent bowl-cuts (or “rounding off the sidegrowth of your heads” – and to think I liked the Beatles), direction to not touch or eat the flesh of a pig
(no bacon and cheddar soup for you!), and a prohibition on the rhythm method of birth control (you
know who you are!). Oh, and presumably, gay sex (which, of course, is why I bring it up).

The section of Leviticus where we find the clobber verses is often called the Purity Code. “Purity” was
mostly about two things. First, it was about keeping things the way they “should” be. “Should” is in
quotes because the guidelines they used for what should and shouldn't be were mostly made up. Said
differently, they arrived at their conclusions in a time that didn't have any science or at least not science
like we have today. Which is to say, they didn't have any science.

What they had was mostly superstition based on observation. A big part of this purity code was the idea
that the world is consistent or follows particular preset rules. For the Israelites this meant things like: all
fish have fins, animals with divided hooves chew cud, and male sperm contains the whole of life
(women provided the incubation chamber). When things didn't adhere to this particular three-thousand
year old way of understanding the world, they were considered an abomination or more precisely
impure.

The second thing the purity code did was define the Israelites as purely not Canaanites. That is, much
like many Christians receive the mark of a cross on their forehead on Ash Wednesday or give
something up for Lent, the codes in Leviticus helped define the people of Israel as the people of Israel.
For the Israelites it was particularly meant to define them as not Canaanites. Basically, it's a way of
showing “we are not them.”

It is true that there are other reasons for many of the laws (just like there are many other reasons to give
something up for Lent), but these are two of the larger ones, and they are ones that most directly apply
to these clobber verses.

So what do we, presumably enlightened Christians of a scientific age, do with this code? Clearly
shrimp are good to eat (for most of us).  For that matter, as far as I'm concerned, to borrow from an old
Benjamin Franklin quote, they are proof that God loves us* – that's just how darned delicious they are.
What we do is recognize Leviticus for what it was: a good thing for the people of God based on how
they understood the world some three-thousand years ago. Interestingly enough, when it comes to
things like shellfish, eating and touching pigs, cutting our sideburns and beards, and stoning children
who mouth off to their parents, we have already managed to do exactly that. Why? Because we
understand that they are just flat out silly laws. Not all “fish” have fins. Some come in the shape of pink
commas and are delicious with a nice Riesling. Because not all split hooved animals chew cud. Some
roll around in the mud and make breakfast just that much better. For that matter, wrap them around a
shrimp, throw them on the grill. I promise you, God will not smite you and once you bite into them
you'll agree, they are not an abomination (they might, however taste slightly “impure” if you do not
devein them well).

What many people have not been able to do is extend that simple understanding to these clobber verses.
We have already established that it would have been impossible for these texts, or any biblical text, to
be about sexual orientation. However, they do clearly describe a male-male sex act (sorry ladies, this
one's just for the guys). But what we have to begin to understand is that the issues which these specific
laws presumed to address within their society, much like the other laws I've mentioned here, are no
longer recognized as true.

Scholars have pointed to various reasons for ancient Israel's seeing male-male sex as taboo in
Leviticus. It may be the same reason the rhythm method was thought to be wrong in the eyes of God,
which presumably is that, as I have mentioned, they thought sperm contained the whole of life (how
typically male-dominated-society of them). Therefore, in their way of seeing it, “Every sperm is sacred.
Every sperm is great. If a sperm gets wasted, God gets quite irate.” On the other hand, it may be that
they thought it was taboo because it went against their understanding that mixing of kinds, just like the
mixing of two kinds of cloth was taboo. Male-male sexual relationships, in that way of seeing things,
mixes up their understanding of gender roles.

Whatever the reason, the perspective in these clobber verses were based on an understanding of sex and
sexuality that was just as misinformed as their understanding of the earth in relationship to the sun, of
fish, of pork and of reasons for stoning children. In our scientific age, it is time to let go of archaic
perspectives and start recognizing the things that are truly an abomination in the eyes of God: lacking
in compassion and love, exercising judgment against others, and practicing and encouraging hate.
(*The actual quote attributed to Benjamin Franklin is, “Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to
be happy.” Sadly, while Ben most probably enjoyed a mug of beer from time to time, the actual quote
is, “Behold the rain which descends from heaven upon our vineyards, there it enters the roots of the
vines, to be changed into wine, a constant proof that God loves us, and loves to see us happy.” In a
happy coincidence, the same rains nourish the barley and hops that are changed into beer. In an even
happier coincidence, wine and beer both pair exceptionally well with shrimp. God is good).

Romans 1:26-28


Good news ladies! Up until now, all of this clobbering has been about the guys. In Romans, you get to
join in. Lucky you.

Romans is the one place the Bible speaks specifically about a female-female sex act. If you listen to
Bible Thumpin' Gay Bashers, you'd be surprised to learn that, while the counts vary on how many
places the Bible directly address heterosexual relationships, it is a lot. Then again, compared to the
precisely one verse the Bible has about female-female sex, even two is one hundred percent more.

The number of heterosexually oriented verses isn't exactly clear. One thing is really clear, there's plenty
of them and, much like the Levitical purity code, we've managed to ignore many of them. So, if you
aren't also denouncing the divorced, then get off your lesbian judging high-horse, because otherwise
you are just picking and choosing who to judge out of your own accord, and then quoting the one Bible
verse that seems to support your choice. And even then, as we will see, it doesn't actually support your
argument. It actually does just the opposite.

In Romans, we have the most extensive discussion of same-sex intercourse in the Bible, a whole two
seemingly specific verses – astounding.

There are plenty of approaches to understanding what Paul is trying to teach us in these texts. Any good
exegesis ultimately points to the reality that what Paul is talking about and what people who use these
verses as clobber verses want Paul to be talking about aren't the same thing. That is, this is not about
homosexual people having consenting homosexual relationships.

One convincing analysis of these texts looks at the fact that one of the most prevalent forms of samesex sex in the Greco-Roman world was male prostitution which frequently involved boys. In that
analysis, the texts become a condemnation of pederasty and prostitution, things of which most
Christians (conservative to liberal) disapprove even today. There is also the perspective that Paul's
pointing to same sex intercourse as being idolatrous could be referring to the practices of priests and
priestesses of Mediterranean fertility gods who regularly practiced that type of prostitution but elevated
it, within a religious context, to the state of idolatry. Those approaches are valid and mostly convincing
perspectives, but they do require a small leap of logic to arrive at their conclusions. Much less of a leap
of logic, mind you, than believing that these texts are about something of which people at that time had
absolutely no comprehension, but slight conjecture all the same.

The analysis that I find the most convincing concerns itself with the word “natural.” It is the word that
has led many to speak of LGBTQ behavior as “unnatural” acts even though they occur throughout
nature (in one study they were found in more than fifteen-hundred species).

As it turns out, the word is actually not “natural.” Not surprisingly, Paul did not speak English. While
Paul performed a number of miraculous things, speaking English (which wasn't around even in its
earliest Prehistoric Old English form yet) was not one of them. Not to bore you too much, but the word
Paul used was the Greek word, physikos. (Now that didn't hurt too much, did it?).

It's important to know the word in Greek because when it is translated into English, it loses a little of its
original meaning. Without even knowing it, Lady GaGa has provided a better modern and contextual
translation of physikosthan the frequently used translation of “normal.” We will get to that in a minute.
It doesn't mean “natural” or “nature” so much as it means “produced by nature.” Those who use these
verses as clobber verses tend to understand “natural” to mean something closer to “normal” than
“produced by nature.” Not surprisingly, they also then define what is and isn't “normal” based on their
personal biases rather than on science or the reality of the world around them (e.g.: “I think gay people
make me feel creepy, so I  henceforth do hereby dub it as an act of not-natural.”).

In reality, physikos has more to do with how things naturally occur in God's Creation.  At this point,
you may have begun to guess that physikos is based on the same root word from which we get the word
“physics” which is, of course, the study of the realities of nature. Conveniently, the way Paul uses
physikos here in Romans, it also means something very similar to “the realities of nature.” It is
concerned with what is of our nature and not with what is defined as acceptable. That is to say, Paul is
concerned with how God created something or someone to be. He is concerned with people going
against their nature or in the words of Lady GaGa herself, if they are “born that way” he's concerned
with them behaving as if they were not.

That is the sin here in Romans, acting against the very nature of who God created you to be. In this
case he seems to be addressing the idea of a same-sex sex act in which at least one of the two are not
attracted to someone of the same sex; they just are not born that way.

Understood this way, it would be equally sinful for someone who is only attracted to someone of the
same sex to have sex with someone of the opposite sex. It goes against their nature; they just weren't
born that way. Ironically, those telling LGBTQ folk that these verses mean they have to stop being
LGBTQ folk are actually telling them to commit the very sin against which these verses warn, going
against their nature. God has a wicked sense of humor.

Because these texts have been used so much to address homosexuality, it was important to address the
issue directly, but the worst thing we could do is to think it is primarily about homosexuality. It is not.
Immediately following verse 28, Paul provides an extensive list of sins. It is so extensive that we all fall
into at least one of the categories. “So there you have it,” says Paul, “we all sin. Don't try to deny it.”
And let's face it, we all go against who we know we were created to be. How many times have you
done something, felt guilt or shame, and then said, “I shouldn't have done that. That's not who I am.”?
As Paul says in the very next chapter, "All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” As he also
says to start that chapter, “Therefore you have no excuse, whoever you are, when you judge others; for
in passing judgment on another you condemn yourself, because you, the judge, are doing the very same
things.”

1 Corinthians 6:9-10 & 1 Timothy 1:9-10


So, remember back a few paragraphs ago when we talked about a Greek word? And remember how it
didn't even hurt one little bit? Good. We are going to do it again.

I have put the 1 Corinthians and 1 Timothy clobber verses together because they both use a particular
Greek word in a particularly similar way. The word is arsenokoitēs and it means “male prostitute.”
(Behold the Greek scholarship. See that it is good and rejoice).  Actually, it could also mean “the
customer of a male prostitute,” or  “boy molester” or  “someone who abuses themselves with a man” or
“using sexual manipulation to acquire money” or … (eh hem, “Behold the great and powerful Greek
Interpretation!” <insert flashing light and crashing thunder>).

So, the word in these two verses, that is frequently interpreted as “homosexual” (which is absurd
because, in Greek, it is clearly only a word referring to men) or “sodomite” (which is absurd, among
other reasons, because that was not the sin of Sodom, as we have already discussed), is really difficult
to translate. Why? In part, because it is only found in these two places and also, in part, because it is
entirely possible that it is a made up word. It is very likely that Greek speaking Jews created this word
to port a Hebrew word to Greek and over time the meaning has been lost. So, it is just hard to translate.
So difficult, in fact, that scholars can't agree on a single best translation. What most biblical Greek
scholars can agree on is that it is not meant to be a blanket statement about a male-male sex act.
Moving on.

There is another word used in 1 Corinthians 6:9: malakos. The good news about this word is that it is
found in lots of literature, so there are plenty of references about its typical intended meaning. It
literally means “soft.”  Some say it means “soft” as in “effeminate, but not in terms of sexual
orientation.” Others, say it is connected with being wasteful of sexual and financial resources. Still
others convincingly point to it singling out a particular type of male prostitution involving young boys.

Also in the list of contenders: sexual perverts, sodomites, weaklings, the self-indulgent. (“Behold the
great and powerful Greek Interpretation!” <insert flashing light and crashing thunder>). Like with
arsenokoitēs there really is no expert consensus on this.

Malakos was a word that could be used to refer to things as diverse as men who were weak in battle (or
who were “soft”), to men who lived extravagant and pampered lives (or who were... well, “soft”). It
was not specifically about sexual relationships. If Paul was actually trying to describe something about
a submissive male in a male-male relationship (which is still not the same as homosexuality as we
understand it today), it's very likely that he would have used kinaedos, which was frequently used to
describe that very relationship. But he didn't. So, stop acting like he was.

Clobbered
In summary of my look at the Christian Church's use of the clobber verses, the bottom line is this, if
want to call homosexuality a sin, go ahead. But you are going to have to admit that it is not biblically a
sin. Which means you are also going to have to admit that you are calling it a sin simply because that's
what you want to do. Because of that, you are going to have to admit that you are a sinner for using
God's name for false pretenses (it's a little thing we like to call using God's name in vain). And then,
Paul has something to tell you, “...you have no excuse, whoever you are, when you judge others; for in
passing judgment on another you condemn yourself, because you, the judge, are doing the very same
things.” (Romans 2:1).

“Clobbering 'Biblical' Gay Bashing”
Written by: Rev. Mark A. Sandlin
Originally Published on The God Article
http://www.thegodarticle.com
http://www.facebook.com/thegodarticle
http://www.thegodarticle.com/7/post/2011/10/clobbering-biblical-gay-bashing.htm

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Risk of HIV Reinfection

If you think its okay, when you are HIV+ to have unprotected sex with other HIV+ people, you need to think again!! 
It is always best to protect yourself if you respect yourself!


Case studies have highlighted cases where reinfection with drug resistant HIV has clinical implications leading to either more rapid disease progression or treatment failure and reduced future treatment options. 

To learn more about reinfection click on the link below!!










Risk of HIV Reinfection May Be Similar to Risk of Initial HIV Infection



Always use protection!!! 
RESPECT yourself - PROTECT yourself!!

Sunday, April 22, 2012

My Letter to HIV


My Letter to HIV

Out of all the models of stages of grief I have found in my journey living with HIV this model very closely resembles what I have gone through. HIV since you invaded my life in 2009 I have become a stronger man. I have learned how to love more freely. I have learned to be more accepting of others. I have learned to trust in my Father God more than ever. I have learned that I do not have to sit by and let you (HIV) control my life.

HIV, you may have invaded my body, but my spirit is strong through my relationship with my Heavenly Father and you will not control me!! I have decided that I am worthy of love. I am worthy of acceptance. I am worthy to be called a Son of God. Therefore, HIV, you will not control my life any longer.

Thank you - HIV- for giving me a new outlook on life. I now appreciate living my life. I enjoy teaching others how NOT to let you INVADE their life as you have mine. I enjoy sharing each day with the love of my life. I enjoy LIVING!! I may be HIV Positive - But I will not be defeated!! 
________________________________________________________________
"7 stages of grief"

Once again, it is important to interpret the stages loosely, and expect much individual variation. There is no neat progression from one stage to the next. In reality, there is much looping back, or stages can hit at the same time, or occur out of order. So why bother with stage models at all? Because they are a good general guide of what to expect.

For example, generally, a long period of "depression" (not clinical depression), isolation, and loneliness happen late in the grief process, months after this life changing event. It actually is normal and expected for you to be very depressed and sad eight months later.


Other's do not understand this, and feel that it should be time for you to "get over it" and rejoin the land of the living. Just knowing that your desire to be alone with your sad reflections at this time is normal will help you deal with outside pressures. You are acting normally. They just don't "get it".
 
___________________________________________________________________________
 
7 Stages of Grief...

1. SHOCK & DENIAL-
You will probably react to learning of the infection with HIV with numbed disbelief. You may deny the reality of the infection at some level, in order to avoid the pain. Shock provides emotional protection from being overwhelmed all at once. This may last for weeks.

2. PAIN & GUILT-
As the shock wears off, it is replaced with the suffering of unbelievable pain. Although excruciating and almost unbearable, it is important that you experience the pain fully, and not hide it, avoid it or escape from it with alcohol or drugs.
You may have guilty feelings or remorse over things you did or didn't do with your life. Life feels chaotic and scary during this phase.

3. ANGER & BARGAINING-
Frustration gives way to anger, and you may lash out and lay unwarranted blame for
what has happened to you. Please try to control this, as permanent damage to your relationships may result. This is a time for the release of bottled up emotion.
You may rail against fate, questioning "Why me?" You may also try to bargain in vain with the powers that be for a way out of your despair ("I will never drink again if you just make this go away")

4. "DEPRESSION", REFLECTION, LONELINESS-
Just when your friends may think you should be getting on with your life, a long period of sad reflection will likely overtake you. This is a normal stage of grief, so do not be "talked out of it" by well-meaning outsiders. Encouragement from others is not helpful to you during this stage of grieving.
During this time, you finally realize the true magnitude of your loss, and it depresses you. You may isolate yourself on purpose, reflect on things you have done, and focus on memories of the past. You may sense feelings of emptiness or despair.

5. THE UPWARD TURN-
As you start to adjust to living life with HIV, your life becomes a little calmer and more organized. Your physical symptoms lessen, and your "depression" begins to lift slightly.

6. RECONSTRUCTION & WORKING THROUGH-
As you become more functional, your mind starts working again, and you will find yourself seeking realistic solutions to problems posed by life with HIV. You will start to work on practical and financial problems and reconstructing yourself and your life living with HIV.

7. ACCEPTANCE & HOPE-
During this, the last of the seven stages in this grief model, you learn to accept and deal with the reality of your situation. Acceptance does not necessarily mean instant happiness. Given the pain and turmoil you have experienced, you can never return to the carefree, untroubled YOU that existed before this life changing event. But you will find a way forward.


You will start to look forward and actually plan things for the future. Eventually, you will be able to think about your life living with HIV without pain; sadness, yes, but the wrenching pain will be gone. You will once again anticipate some good times to come, and yes, even find joy again in the experience of living. 

There is no completion date to grieving...let your emotions flow through the stages of grief.

Latest Lab work results

I am so excited that I am doing so well living with HIV.. My latest lab results just prove that great nutrition and medication can keep your body healthy even living with HIV..

CD4 - 1554

HIV RNA - <20 undetectable!!!!!

Liver and kidneys doing great!!

I love love love my LIMU!! The LIMU I drink daily is keeping my body protected from the harmful side effects of the medication I am taking.

I have read all the side effects of Atripla, the HIV medication I am taking and I am thankful for LIMU which counteracts all the negative side effects.

To learn more about Atripla go here: http://www.atripla.com/

To learn more about LIMU go here: http://www.greathealth.iamlimu.com

Thank you for reading my blog... Will post more soon!!

God is great ALL the TIME!!!!!!

David


Monday, April 16, 2012

In loving memory of Kenneth James Weishuhn

In loving memory of Kenneth James Weishuhn




If you have CHILDREN talk to them about bullying and about the diversity of the world they are entering. This has to STOP. I am so sick of seeing all these young people ending their beautiful lives because of other peoples ignorance!!! It is NOT okay to bully anyone period!!!! We are all God's wonderful creation!! IT is time to put an end to the ignorance of intolerance (lack of toleration; unwillingness or refusal to tolerate or respect contrary opinions or beliefs, persons of different races or backgrounds, etc.)!!!!!




Saturday, April 14, 2012

Confidential and Anonymous HIV Counseling and Testing Sites - KNOW YOUR STATUS!!

Confidential and Anonymous HIV Counseling and Testing Sites

Oklahoma City

Guiding Right, Inc.
7901 NE 10th
Street, Suite A-111
Midwest City, OK 73110
(405) 733-0771
www.guidingright.org

RAIN Oklahoma
Regional AIDS Intercommunity Network
600 NW 23rd
Street, Suite 101
Oklahoma City, OK 73103
(405) 232-2437
www.rainoklahoma.org

Red Rock Behavioral Health Sciences
4400 N. Lincoln Blvd.
Oklahoma City, OK 73105
(405) 425-0473
www.red-rock.com

Tulsa


Guiding Right, Inc.
5424 N. Madison
Tulsa, OK 74126
www.guidingright.org

H.O.P.E., Inc.
Health, Outreach, Prevention, Education
2445 South Yale Avenue
Tulsa, Oklahoma 74114
(918) 749-TEST (8378)
www.hopetesting.org


Confidential Only HIV Counseling and Testing Sites


All County Health Department STD Clinics offer Confidential HIV Testing
                     
Oklahoma City County Health Department
HIV testing is provided along with STD exam only.

Tulsa City County Health Department
$20 charge for HIV testing without complete STD exam.

Oklahoma City


Be The Change Inc.
3636 N.W. 51 Street
Oklahoma City, OK  73112
(405) 557-0005
jonathanroberts@bethechangeok.org.
Contact: Executive Director,  Jonathan Roberts

City Rescue Mission
800 W. California Ave.
Oklahoma City, OK 73106
Rev. Debbi McCullock, ARNP
405-232-2709 Ext. 133
dmccullock@cityrescue.org

Community Health Centers, Inc.
Central Oklahoma Healthy Start Initiative
3017 N. Martin Luther King Avenue
Oklahoma City, OK 73111
(405) 427-3200
grogers@okh4b.org

Community Health Centers, Inc.
Mary Mahoney Memorial Health Center
12716 NE 36th
Oklahoma City, OK 73140
(405) 769-3301
http://mmmhc.org/index.html 11/2011 3

Expressions OKC Outreach Center
4010 N. Youngs Blvd.
Oklahoma City, OK 73112
(405) 761-1878
Neill Coffman Spurgin
pastorneill@expressionsokc.com
http://www.expressionscommunitycenter.com/


Healing Hands Health Care Services
411 NW 11th Street
Oklahoma City, OK 73103
(405) 272-0476
http://www.hhhcs.org

Latino Community Development Agency (LCDA)
420 SW 10th Street
Oklahoma City, OK 73109
(405) 236-0701
www.latinoagencyokc.org

Oklahoma County Juvenile Detention Center (clients only)
5905 North Classen Court
Oklahoma City, OK 73118
(405) 713-6480
jjdebjoh@oklahomacounty.org

Oklahoma University Health Sciences Center
OUHSC/Infectious Diseases Institute Title D Program
711 Stanton L. Young Blvd., Suite 430
Oklahoma City, OK 73104
(405) 271-8001
http://idi.ouhsc.edu/default.asp

Turning Point
Community Action Agency of Oklahoma City
& Oklahoma/Canadian Counties
1607 SW 15
Oklahoma City, OK 73108
(405) 634-0508
www.caaofokc.org


Tulsa 


12 & 12 Incorporated
Center for Addiction Treatment & Recovery
6333 East Skelly Drive
Tulsa, OK 74135
(918) 779-7171
Contact: Ruben Herron
Ruben.Herron@12and12.org

Tulsa Healthy Start
Tulsa Health Department
4616 East 15th Street
Tulsa,  OK 74112
Contact person:
Clara Willis
cwillis@tulsa-health.org

OSU Internal Medicine Specialty Services
635 W. 11th Street
Tulsa, OK 74127
(918) 382-5058

Other Locations


Community Health Centers, Inc.
Mary Mahoney Memorial Health Center at Langston
300 MLK
Langston, OK 73050
(405) 466-2535
obzinder.robinson@chciokc.org

Eagle Ridge Family Treatment Center
1916 E. Perkins
Guthrie, OK  73044
(405)-282-8232
Stacy Dunn
sdunn@eagleridgeok.org

Green Country AIDS Coalition
2063 Mahaney Avenue
Tahlequah, OK 74464
Barbara Williams
(918) 207-4977
datebutwait@cherokee.org


MAMA Knows Inc.
10 West Main, Suite 420
Ardmore, OK 73401
Kayla Walker, Executive Director
(580) 277-0367
Kayla@mamaknowsinc.org

National Indian Women’s Health Resource Center
228 South Muskogee Avenue
Tahlequah, OK 74464
918-456-6094
Contact Person: Desirae Morton Bloomer

Waynoka Mental Health Authority
1095 Nickerson
Waynoka, OK 73860
(580) 824-0674
Contact Person: Kristen Ross, Executive Director

YWCA/Enid
525 S. Quincy
Enid, OK 73701
(580) 234-7581
Contact person: Melissa Blanton, Executive Director