What is living?
In the dictionary this is what is defined as "living":
–adjective
2.
in actual existence or use; extant: living languages.
3.
active or thriving; vigorous; strong: a living faith.
4.
burning or glowing, as a coal.
6.
pertaining to, suitable for, or sufficient for existence orsubsistence: living conditions; a living wage.
7.
of or pertaining to living persons: within living memory.
9.
in its natural state and place; not uprooted, changed, etc.:living rock.
–noun
14.
( used with a plural verb 
) living persons collectively (usuallypreceded by the ): glad to be among the living.
) living persons collectively (usuallypreceded by the ): glad to be among the living.
15.
British . the benefice of a clergyman.
In the Bible we read:
John 4:10-15 (New International Version, ©2011)
10 Jesus answered her, “If you knew the gift of God and who it is that asks you for a drink, you would have asked him and he would have given you living water.”
11 “Sir,” the woman said, “you have nothing to draw with and the well is deep. Where can you get this living water? 12 Are you greater than our father Jacob, who gave us the well and drank from it himself, as did also his sons and his livestock?”
13 Jesus answered, “Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, 14 but whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life.”
15 The woman said to him, “Sir, give me this water so that I won’t get thirsty and have to keep coming here to draw water.”
So what is living to me, a person living with HIV?
Living to me is not letting a virus (HIV) control my life. It is getting out there to help others know that they can have a great life even if they are "living" with HIV.
HIV is a killer we know this already. Many of us living with HIV have seen friends or family members die from having HIV and the complications that come along with this killer virus. We fear for our own lives on a daily basis because we have this virus "living" inside us that is relentless in its endeavor to destroy our bodies. So what do we do? Do we live in fear of dying? Do we live life to the fullest and not let this little destroyer effect how we live our lives?
I know there are those our there who deny they have the virus and act as tho they do not. This is not the way to live!! Denial does not bring healing to your spirit or your body. Many fear taking medication because of all the side effects listed on the bottle or paperwork that comes with the medication. Many fear loosing those they love if they reveal their status. Many fear a life of defeat.
In the beginning I can honestly say that I lived in fear. Fear that if someone touched me when I bled they would get HIV, fear that if I revealed my status I would be unloved, fear that those closest to me would abandoned me. Fear is natural. I have learned through that fear to be careful, to trust, to love and most of all to no longer fear.
So now what? I chose to live my life NOT in fear of what if, but How can I?
How can I make a difference in someone else's life today?
How can I help someone else who needs a friend?
What can I do today to make a difference?
I chose to live as the dictionary says:
–adjective
I chose to let the "living water" that flows from the throne of Grace move through me!
I want my life to be an example of God's unending love flowing out to touch those who are hurting. I want to be that friend, when there seems to be no one to talk too. I pray daily that God direct my path. Although I may have HIV, I know HIV does not have me!!
I encourage you to find your place in the world. Let God's love fill your spirit with faith, knowing that His healing flows through you daily. God's strength will help you fight the fear. Do not let fear control you. Turn the fear into a positive. Let it make you stronger. Yes, I know it is a daily struggle living with HIV of not knowing what the virus is actually doing inside your body. But I know that faith in God strengthens my very being allowing me to "LIVE".
Take comfort in knowing that there is help, there is medication to help your body fight the virus (HIV). At this time there is no cure for HIV, but there is a way to fight back. Take your medication even if you do not like the side effects, fill your body with vitamins and nutrients so it can fight. Be good to your body and it can fight.
God's word says:
Psalm 139:14 reads; "I will praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; marvelous are your works, and my soul knows very well." In the original Hebrew text, the word 'fearfully' means: with great reverence and heart-felt interest and respect. The word 'wonderfully' means: unique, set apart, uniquely marvelous. WOW! No wonder the psalmist bursts out with exuberant praise in this verse. He realized the great love and concern that went into his unique and very individual creation. According to this Scripture, you truly are a Master Piece! The next time you have the temptation to ask the Lord, "Don't you care what is happening to me?" Remember this verse, because the total truth is that He cares and loves you with an acute intensity that cannot ever be measured.
So my friends, do not let HIV control you!!
May God bless you on your journey!! May you have peace and understanding!! May you find your strength to let go of the fear and let boldness arise in your spirit!!
Remember this: YOU may have HIV - HIV does not have you unless you give it the power over you!!
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