Lately, I’ve been reconnecting with friends I haven’t seen in quite a
while. Some of them I haven’t seen since 2015. After we gave each other
a giant hug and a kiss on the cheek, we would sit at the bar to order
our go-to drinks (Jack Daniel’s with 2-3 rocks here) and immediately
dive into each other’s lives, catching each other up on everything
that’s been going on. One question that I kept hearing from my friends
during these catch-up sessions is “How was your summer?” I’ve come to
realize that every time this question was asked, I hesitated. I knew how
to answer it, but I was always slightly afraid to truthfully answer it.
Where do I begin?
Processing what happened in Orlando.
Figuring out what to do after getting an eviction notice.
Having a bomb go off just a few blocks from me.
Losing the trust I had in a couple of people who were once friends of mine.
And
now, seeing Charlotte, one of the cities I grew up in, being put under a
state of emergency because of the protests happening right now.
Some
people may see this as being dramatic (I’m also known for being bit
overdramatic sometimes), but my mental health hasn’t been 100% this
summer. I’ve truly realized how much I took my day-to-day, positive
state of mind for granted. That dark, unknown thing called depression
may have crept up on me a little bit this summer, and I didn’t realize
how long it would take to get out of that funk.
After
accepting the fact that this was happening, I began opening up. I
started talking to family first, then some of my close friends that I
share everything with. After speaking with them about what was going on
in my mind, everything just seemed more manageable. It felt like I could
take hold the things that were once spiraling out of control. And by
golly, getting that feeling back is freaking great.
So
now that my state of mind is in a much better place, what did I get
from all of this? I learned how to be open, honest, and vulnerable to
those who will never judge me. I now know that it’s OK to be a bit more
affected from any type of event, whether it’s something very personal or
something that affects millions of people. And, most importantly, if
someone else is going through similar difficult times, I’ll make sure to
let them know that if they need someone to talk to, I’m here for them.
I hope you do that last part as well.
Daniel
Szymczyk is the Founder and CEO of The HIV League, a nonprofit
organization dedicated to empowering the HIV Community through
scholarship, wellness, and education. Check them out at www.hivleague.org.
Read more articles from POZ, here.
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