Monday, January 27, 2014

"MY HIV MY STRENGTH"



The reason I chose 
"MY HIV MY STRENGTH" 
for
MY HIV CAMPAIGN.

Ever since I was diagnosed HIV+ I have had a mental warfare going on in my mind. As the years are passing by, this being my year number five, I am getting STRONGER. I am Coming Out as a Warrior against the STIGMA that comes along with the diagnosis of being HIV+.

I don't think anymore, I know that we tend to beat ourselves up more than anyone else for being HIV+. I have learned that the battle in my mind has been my battle against myself trying to forgive myself for not protecting myself. It was my decision NOT to protect my self from getting HIV, just because I was comfortable with the person I was with. It was not their fault. They did not know they were HIV+.

Getting tested on a regular basis if you are having sex with multiple partners is a MUST. You have no idea where that other person has been or even if they have been tested. People will also lie for their own sexual pleasure. So be STRONG and PROTECT yourself. You are the only YOU that will ever be.

Having HIV has given me a new look on life. I get up everyday and thank God that I have another day to help someone that is suffering or hurting from the news - "You Are HIV+"!! - letting them know that I have been there when you first hear those words and have survived the horror of mental torture. HIV has given me the strength to look at life with a different set of eyes. Life is so precious and we take advantage of it everyday. We have all heard "Take time to smell the Roses". Well now I actually understand what that means.

Life passes by so fast. Just like the Rose blooms in the Spring and is fragrant for a time, then it fades and withers away so quickly. So as we live this life we need to slow down and take time to enjoy what time we have on this earth before we wither and go away. Having HIV has made me STOP and smell the Roses..

There are still times when depression tries to rear its ugly head.
During those times I really have to thank God for my personal relationship with HIM. I take the time to pray and meditate on His Word so I know the truth - that He is truly there in my time of need.

So what I say: I have HIV - but know this one thing HIV does NOT have me!! Live your life as if today was the last day you would be here and make the very most of that time!! Someone out there needs your outstretched hand, your ears to hear them talk, your shoulder to cry on, and your arms to hold them tight.

I want to thank HIV for making me STRONG!!!
I am HIVICTORIOUS!!!!

David Moorman
Diagnosed May 28, 2009
Infected February 2009

Indiana Lawmaker's Gay Son Speaks Out on Dad's Anti-Equality Vote


Indiana Lawmaker's Gay Son Speaks Out on Dad's Anti-Equality Vote





I applauded Chris for working on his relationship
with his Dad. Family is so important for support!!
We do not always see Eye to Eye but that is okay!!
Love is the most important thing we can share
with each other.

Marriage Equality in Indiana








If you did not get to see this performance last night, I just wanted to share it so you could see how moving it is to see interracial couples, straight couples, and LGBT couples all joining together to get MARRIED on National Television!! It was a very touching moment in our history. I with millions of others watching had to grab the tissue as we watched this beautiful display of love as Queen Latifah officiated and Macklemore, Mary Lambert, Ryan and Madonna sang "Same Love" to them. It not only gave me goose bumps but tears that just kept coming like a river.. I will cherish this moment in history for the rest of my life!!

My Personal Journey Living with HIV/AIDS Continues
I am now in my Fifth year living with HIV…

I knew from the beginning, writing this section of my continued journey would not be an easy one for me to write. I have had a struggle for the past couple of years with an injury from my last job, to becoming disabled. What a blow below the belt right? Through it all I have somehow been able to keep my sanity because of my wonderful support network of family, friends and church family. Of course, I could not have sustained if it had not been for my wonder spouse, who puts up with me on a daily basis. I am sure I drive him almost insane with the mood swings and all the hospital stays. But let me stop, I am getting ahead of myself. I do that sometimes.

I want to tell you that everything has been a bed of roses for the past couple of years. I want to tell you that life has been wonderful and full of joy and happiness. I want to tell you a lot of things that would make this journal entry so much lighter, but I cannot sit here and lie about my personal life experience. Now granted not everyone goes through the same emotional, physical or even spiritual process the same. So as you read my journey please do think this is how it will be on your personal journey living with HIV/AIDS. We ALL experience HIV/AIDS in our own unique way. However, we ALL share one thing in common; we that have HIV/AIDS know what it is like to be going through some kind of personal emotional journey. The reason I am writing this journal is to hopefully give inspiration and hope to someone who may feel hopeless or that they are the only one who is going through it. YOU are NEVER alone. Trust me there is always someone out there that has gone through it before you.

So let me get back to telling you about the last couple of years of this journey I have been on. Like I started to say in the first part of this article my health has seemed to be a roller coaster ride from the dark side. After losing my job, from the workers compensation incident, I decided I would be okay for a while and just look for a better job. I never found one. Being the semi smart person that I am I thought what the heck I will just go back to school and finish getting my college degree. That would have been great, if what happen next did not happen to me. Everything was looking great. I had all the financial assistance I needed to help pay for my education. I was taking the classes necessary to finish the degree I wanted. Two weeks into attending classes, bam, and my world came crashing down around me. I was between classes apparently when my life changed forever.
I had gone out to my truck to get a drink of my soda, when it hit me. I totally blacked out with my eyes wide open. It was like my brain shut down but I could see everything around me. I had no idea where I was, so I called my Mother. She told me I was attending school and to look around at the buildings and let her know what I saw hoping it would jog my memory. Well, it didn’t, I was so scared and I wanted to go home. So I just got in my truck and took off home. I am surprised I found my way home. Thank you, God, for always watching out for me in my time of need.

I started having hard to explain migraine headaches. Well, I went to two different emergency rooms within the next two weeks and was sent to a neurologist only to find out that I had been having mini TIA’s. I went through a lot of testing. I even had a nerve test done and found out that I have Peripheral Neuropathy in my hands, arms, legs and feet. So you can imagine that I thought I was falling apart. The story does not end there.

The year 2013, was a very busy year with doctor appointments and hospital stays. I was in the heart hospital three times last year. I had to have my gallbladder removed. I started seeing a psychiatrist and a counselor. I have been experiencing so many different things going wrong with this ole body as I am aging that there are times I just want to give up. Giving up is NOT the answer.

I tell you all these things because it is not an easy journey living with a disease that eats away at your immune system. Yes, the medication that keeps the virus under control is great. However, you need to know that you still have the virus. Since you have HIV/AIDS it is up to you how you are going to take care of yourself. It is so very important that you surround yourself with people that will support you and comfort you.

I have met so many wonderful people who have been LIVING with HIV/AIDS for 20+ years online and in person. They all have told me the same thing. You just have to LIVE your life. You may HIV but know that HIV does not have you unless you let it. If you have just found out you are HIV positive and need someone to talk to, you can always call the hotline in your state and they can help you get in contact with support in your state. Here is the page to find the Hotline for your State: http://hab.hrsa.gov/gethelp/statehotlines.html .

Having HIV/AIDS today is NOT the end of your LIFE.

Forgiving yourself for allowing yourself to get yourself into this situation will probably be the hardest thing you will ever do.
You will be able to talk to your friends (true friends), family, pastor, doctor, whoever you need to about how you are feeling. But when it comes to forgiving yourself, which is going to be the one thing, you are going to have to DO, if you want to move on and have a happy life, this is when you need others the most. In my next article I will go into detail about depression and how it plays tricks on the mind of those living with HIV/AIDS (My Personal Experience).

For now I leave you with this:
God is Good – ALL THE TIME
His Grace and Tender Mercy is enough for me..
May God’s Blessings and Peace be upon all who take the time to read my journey.
Stay tuned for more to come.
David A. Moorman
Diagnosed May 28, 2009 - Infected February 2009

It is time to Rise Above HIV and let the 
World know we are Human
Not a Disease.